I realised something last night that the key to resolving conflicts with someone is by talking it out. I say this coz I just did that for the first time. Man! Was I nervous or what? But there was so much I have learnt that it will be hard to forget. Ok when I say conflicts I mean any kind of misunderstanding that looms large in a particular relationship whether friendship or hubby-wifey relationship....Most of the time we clam up and brood on what was said and literally meditate on it for days..... Then sarcastic comments are poured but the real reason for dismay is not disclosed.
One of the real reason why we do not actually sit down and talk it out is that we are basically afraid to do so or we are too proud. If we are really keen on pursuing that particular relationship that holds the risk of falling between the cracks, we will take that extra step. Maybe some of you reading this might say that they face the risk of hurting the person. What about that? In any relationship there are bound to be times where we will hurt one another, coz we are human. But what makes the relationship special is that we still strive to love and care for the person in spite of all the shortcomings. If that friend has hurt you in ignorance, tell him/her in love. Choose your words carefully. Mull over what you will say...
Rehearse in your mind over and over again. Don't say anything in anger. Stay calm. I'm sure your friend after hearing you out will have a good reason to justify his/her behavior. Remember it takes two to tango!! Be honest and transparent. If your friend is genuine, he/she will seek to restore the friendship, otherwise they will just flare up and walk out of the relationship.
In the end, it takes a lot more than we think to maintain friendships and other important relationships. Egos have to be kept aside and much sacrifice is required for the relationship to blossom. Communication is the key!!
3 comments:
hmmm i agree with you...it definitely helps clearing off a lot of undealt issues...
If not for the sake of relationship, atleast for ur own peace of mind, i guess its very impt to confront. Whnever ive had a argument or any issues, it wud bother me the whole day and i wud just keep wondering why? Esp. if it is someone close to you, the intensity increases.
You knw, ppl say lets just back off sometimes, but i feel that only gives room to more misunderstandings. But again, it differs from person to person. Coz by giving space at times, it helps to think over our actions. For me, confronting has always helped, even if it means bawling out all your frustrations. It feels like the storm before the calm.
Like you said, it really depends on the individual one deals with. Some people don't like to talk about it at all. They just blow their top....I have experienced that once....
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